When the world is against you

You ever get the feeling the world is rooting for you to fail? It seems like the more outrageous you want to be the more everyone wants to bury you. During times when I feel like my walls are closing in I simply just extend my arms and scream out. I know it sounds like it’s something dramatic on my part but it works. I’ve lived a lifetime trying to please others and trying to gain a favorable perception. The truth is that the only thing that I should concern myself with is my own happiness.

When the world is against you and rooting for you to fail you need to be most inspired. If nothing else just for the sake of making everyone eat a nice bowl of steaming shit, yes I wrote the word shit. Next time you find yourself in that really awkward spot feeling sorry for yourself and like the world is your biggest enemy, fight only to make everyone understand that their opinion is meaningless. This is not some sort of ridiculous attempt at arrogance but an attempt at surviving and thriving with grace. My points are best validated by the following list:

1. Not everyone has the courage to follow their heart.
2. Not everyone admires or understands courage.
3. People will judge when they are too disgusted with their own lives in order to improve.
4. People will attack because they only know fear.
5. People will constantly  ridicule because jealousy drives them to do so.

When the feeling gets you remember to scream out and move on. As you move forward and you get farther away from the people that attack you it’s easy to see how behind they really are.

Why is life such a fickle proposition?

Sometimes I like to sit back and wonder and sometimes I lean forward and continue to wonder. I wait and wait and then wait some more. Answers seem to elude me and the question is simple. Life is fickle and sometimes impossible to understand but I keep trying. People come in and they leave and the big deals you want just sort of get away without notice. So why exactly do we continue to care? Why do we fight on? Every damn time this life just seems so very clouded and unreal.

There are the little moments though like splashing water in the beach or skipping stones across a small creek. There is that wonderful smile of a loved one or that quick achievement that stays ingrained in everyone’s long term memory. I still lean forward and wonder and then I wonder some more.

Eventually I see myself sitting in a celestial chair that’s caressed by the colors in the cosmic palette. Stars fly around me and everything aligns and falls out of alignment with sensational precision. I look around and wait for an answer to my question. Why is life such a fickle proposition? I will never get it, not even if I lived a million years. The universe and its order are a mystery, so is life, everything is fickle. Our job is to adapt and change with the order of things, not really to spend a lifetime questioning them.